Finite Dreams

A girl in search of the meaning of life. I'm slowly finding my place in this thing called life.

Monday, February 27, 2006

Brokeback Mountain

After beeing trapped in suburban Minnesotta for the last 2 weeks, I decided I was going to go out on my own and spend my day exactly the way I wanted to. So I went to the mall near my hotel. It's pretty complete because they have a Barnes and Noble, Target and more importantly a movie house.

I decided I was going to watch "Brokeback Mountain" or what has been referred to for the last year as "that gay cowboy movie". I was curious to find out what the buzz was all about or if it was warranted in the first place. Problem was, it started showing in Manila when I had already left which is why I have to watch by myself now in Midewestern America.

Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal play Ennis and Jack. 2 cowboys raised in the tradition of macho America with the rodeos, the tough-boy stance and the drinking. On the surface, they seem like everyone else. Except that both of them develop feelings for each other and have a long-drawn out affair that survives beyond their own marriages to other women, children and work. Jake wants to be with Ennis and build a life with him, but Ennis is consumed by shame and fear which prevents him from ever expressing who he really is.

The story itself is powerful because I believe it can apply to anyone whether you're straight or gay. All the actors give good performances. Heath as Ennis totally captures the inner conflict of the character: the rage, sadness and fear without using so many words. Jake as Jack displays his pain and longing to be with the love of his life. Michelle Williams and even Anne Hathaway play their roles convincingly as the wives of men whom deep in their hearts they know are not really in love with them.

Although the movie itself is good, I found that I could not relate to it on a deep level. Maybe I just wasn't in a proper state of mind that day. But I think the reason why I could not feel it the way I should have is that I could not understand the experience of pining away for someone for years and not doing anything about it. Maybe when I'm a bit older and I've had a lot more experience then I'll be able to appreciate the film better. Don't get me wrong though. It's one movie worth watching.