The Night Economy

10 years ago, if you were part of the night economy, most probably you were working in a convenience store, restaurant, bar, or a not-so-wholesome establishment. That's all changed now. With the emergence of call centers, a lot of people find themselves having to work on the graveyard shift.

I now find myself working in a call center. Since I find myself still emotionally incapable of handling a normal job in the "conventional" corporate world, I decided to give this new job a shot. I don't take calls though. I work as a Trainer. I don't teach people though to develop fake American accents. I teach them the business skills to make them do their jobs better.

I've only been there for less than a month, but I've already had a lot of interesting experiences. From day 1, i had to make a lot of adjustments since this is a completely different world from one that I was used to. Here, anything goes and people are a little more relaxed than others. I am only required to work for 8 hours a day/5 days a week and no one from work has ever called me on my cellphone. I can go to work in formal office wear or go in my rattiest shirt and jeans depending on my mood.

I go to work when everyone is on their way home and go home when everyone is on their way to work. I'm still in the mall almost every single day, but it's during the quiet hours when everyone is still slaving away at the office. I still get to see the sun though because I make it a point to go to the gym after my shift. Plus, whatever time I slept that morning, I always wake up at 4 pm.

So far, I am enjoying my job. I am occasionally stressed out because of certain important deadlines. That's because I'm still currently in the process of building and designing the training materials for the training program I'm supposed to deliver by Feb. 15. There's also the whole murky issue of office politics that I found myself right in the middle of from Day 1. Other than that, I'm a lot more relaxed now. Plus, I finally have the time to indulge myself in my other hobbies outside of work and go the gym as often I want to.

I think I can say I've lived a pretty interesting life so far. Maybe I'm not as intellectually deep as other people or as sucessful as others, but at least I've lived it mostly on my own terms. It's not perfect. There have been many troubles along the way, but at least now I am at peace with myself. How is this going to last? I don't know, but I'm wiling to give it a fair chance.

Updates on Work

I've been doing a lot of work in the last week. My schedule has just been absolutely crazy!!!!! I have to attend tons of meetings, work on the training materials, conceptualize how to deliver the training eventually and interview people who will be joining the team. Then in January, I have to attend a training program.

All in all though, I will have to say that I like this job. It's a whole new challenge that's really keeping my brain active and occupied. I just have to watch myself and make sure I don't burn myself out again.

This week, I'll try to skip as many meetings as I can. I really need to work on the presentation/training manuals. The client still has to review it.

With the way things are going for my career again, it's still very unlikely that I will ever find a boyfriend.

Galera Trip

I spent 1 weekend in Puerto Galera last January 8-9. I was dragged on this trip suddenly by my childhood friends. I really wasn't planning on going because I had just started with my new job and all, but I decided not to miss the opportunity of spending quality time with the people I rarely get to see. This was really a special time, because 1 of my childhood friends who is currently based in the States, came home for her Christmas vacation and decided to spend one of her weekends with us.

I left Manila on a Saturday morning. Gosh! I almost missed the bus. I was so sleepy and woke up a little later than I planned. I managed to get dressed in 5 minutes, packed my bags and sped off in a cab to the bus pick-up point which is somewhere in Manila. After that, the bus took us to the Batangas pier and there was a ferry waiting there. It was an additional 1 hour ride to the Puerto Galera pier. Since my friends got there the day before, they just made arrangements for the hotel to pick me up. The resort we stayed at was at least another 30 minutes away. When I got there, I didn't even have time to rest because I had to take another 30-minute tricycle ride to another part of the island. My friends were already waiting for me at White Beach, which is one of the more busy spots in Puerto Galera. We all had lunch first at one of the restaurants beside the beach. After our lunch, we took a short boat ride to the other side of the island so we could go snorkelling. I thought that was quite fun, eventhough I really can't swim.

At around 5 PM, we went back to White Beach and stayed the rest of the time there for a little more swimming and dinner before heading back out to our original resort. I think everyone had a long day so at around 11 my friends were all asleep already. Actually, I brought the alcohol supply for the trip. Since we didn't really drink that night, I have 1 bottle of gin and 1 bottle of flavored lambanog in my cupboard at home.

The next day we had to wake up early. We had to catch the 9 AM ferry ride out of Puerto Galera back to Batangas. Got back to Manila at around 1 PM. I went home really sleepy, but with absolutely no regrets for taking the weekend off outside Manila.

Busy, Busy, Busy

Ever since I started working last Jan. 4, I've been extremely busy. Actually, I spent 1 week at the new employees training course of the company I now work for. God, was I in for a culture shock! I came from a very formal and strict industry where all my decisions and statements had to be measured carefully. Suddenly, I'm in a world where almost everyone is younger than me and where I have to unlearn some of the things I really got used to.

I was supposed to attend the training for 2 weeks, but I was pulled out early and asked to report to my division. So last January 11, I found myself attending various meetings, getting introduced to tons of people and having to absorb a lot of information in a very short span of time.

What is it am I supposed to be doing again? Well, I'm a Skills/Product trainer specifically assigned to 1 division here in the office. I don't handle employee orientations. I take of the stuff that happens after that. The thing is, I am the 1st ever trainer they hired for this particular account, so they don't even have the training materials prepared yet. I end up having to do a lot of things all at once. I have to study the company and the various services and products they provide, conduct a training needs analysis by interviewing the people in my division, write the training materials and ultimately deliver the training program after getting the final approval from the client. The good news is, I'm already done with the outline.

So here I am living out another stage in my life and career. It's turning out to be a very interesting experience. Come to think of it, I've never had a boring job. I'm also currently on the graveyard shift so this is exposing me to the whole night economy.:) I'm actually much better rested because this is finally conforming to my true body clock. I work much more efficiently at night. No dead hours for my brain. I definitely intend to stay for a year. After that, we'll see where I find myself again.

Just A Useless Post on My Family

Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever written a post about my family. I guess when you live with certain people everyday, it's easy for us to take them for granted. Unless someone suddenly dies, and that changes the whole picture.

Being the youngest, I was always spoiled in my family. I was the little girl no one wanted to ever grow up. If they had the money, they never refused me anything I ever asked for. My family wasn't perfect, but I guess I was much better off than majority of the population.

I wasn't much trouble growing up because I wasn't a very sociable child. So I was at home most of the time. The only problem with me was that I was in the hospital almost every week until the age of 5. I had very weak lungs and I got almost every lung-related disease possible. It's something I still have to live with until now.

Then as with everyone else, I went to school, met new friends, had many misadventures, and eventually went to college. That was the most important time of my life because it was when I finally learned about the outside world and about guys. I was so naive before that because I was placed in an all-girls school from grade school to high school. After college, my childhood friends were so shocked with the changes that happened in my personality.

I left my parents' house just before graduation. I had a huge fight with my Dad because he freaked out when he saw that it was a guy who brought me back to our house one night. He accused me of being a bad daughter for going out with a guy. Of course, I got so mad that I threw my last college grades at him (I got my highest grades ever during the last semester.), packed all I owned in a sports bag and left the next morning. I never returned to the house ever again except to visit him on weekends. Our fight was compounded by the fact that I found out he had never forgiven me for taking up Judo as a sport. For almost 2 years, we were barely on speaking terms. It was only when my mother got seriously ill that we started talking again.

My mother is the exact opposite of my father. She's really cool and she never really got mad at me except when I lost the ring she bought me. She knew how to handle my personality and could get me to do what she wanted without me raising much of a fuss. She knew when to push and when to just let me be. Most of all, it was my mother who taught me the value of being my own person and not depending on another guy for my happiness. She didn't make the best decisions herself, but at least she made sure, that none of her daughters would ever make the same mistakes she did. She died on June 12, 2003. We were both at peace with each other at that time. Although, there are days when I still miss her. Even when she couldn't talk anymore, I would just give her a hug and it said volumes already about our relationship.

My sister is probably the most influential person in my life. Where our parents failed in being parents, we learned to fill in the gaps by ourselves. When I was a child, she was there to supervise my education. She taught me how to read and write. She was guide in telling me what were good books and not. She tried to make me write poetry, but even then we already knew I didn't have that gift. She always pushed me to go beyond what the school was teaching me and develop my own sensibilities. I owe it to her why I passed the best schools when I applied for college. When I was in college, she gave me the freedom to believe in what I really wanted to do, whether or not it was practical.

Last night, when I was really sick, she was there to watch over me. She would wake up once in a while just to check how my fever was going. Although I could really take care of myself if I wanted to, it was really nice knowing that there was someone who cared enough to see how I was doing. We have our arguments once in a while especially when my rebelliousness comes out, but in the end, we still find our strength in one another.

My Only New Year's Resolution

As I was checking my friend's blogs, I noticed that everyone seems to be in a very reflective mood these days. I guess it's really that time of the year. In my previous entries, I already shared what the year 2004 will mean to me in the years to come. Then I realized, that I forgot one important tradition of the new year which is to prepare my list of resolutions.

I don't think I've had any new year's resolutions in a long time because I always believed that I would end up breaking them anyway. Plus, I also believe that things happen in their proper time. So why suddenly come up with something this year? I realized that I really need to do this if I am going to be fully happy with my life.

I have no complaints. Like I said, I know where I stand as a person. I am aware of my stregths and my weaknesses. I know who my friends are. I also have a clear idea of what I want to do with my life. However, there is just one thing that is left unresolved in my heart and we all know what that is or rather who it is.

For the year 2005, I promise to let go of the past. I will no longer idealize it because it wasn't the greatest thing that happened in my life. I will no longer delude myself into thinking that he was the only person I ever loved and can ever love. My life didn't end when he left. In fact, I survived the pain, the alcoholism and the mess that came after him. Later on, I found out who I was meant to become. At the same time, I learned to really appreciate the important people in my life.

I will stop stalking him on Friendster in order to get updates on his life. If you check my Friendster page, he is no longer on my list of friends. I even deleted the testimonial I wrote for him. Yes, I will remain friends with some of his friends, but if they ever ask me how I feel about him, then I will just pretend I never heard the question in the first place. If they try to update about what's up with him, then I will quickly change the topic.

God help me because this is probably the Nth time I've had to erase him from my life completely. But I will be successful this year. It's been more than 4 years since the big breakup, I think I deserve to find my own happiness. This doesn't mean though that I will start dating or open my heart to a new relationship. That's a different question altogether that will be answered at a different time.